All the Classroom's a Stage...

Tuis Nisan 30, 2022

A uniformed student walks along, minding his own business, when suddenly he is accosted by two boys of apparently similar age.

"Stop!" commands one of the boys. "Where do you think you are going?"

"I'm going to school," replies the student warily.

"I don't think so!" retorts the other boy. "Not like that!"

"Why not?" demands the student. "Did I do something wrong? Who are you?"

Suddenly the two boys throw open their jackets, strike a pose, and reply in sync, "We're the Fashion Police!"

No, it's not a scene from Monty Python's Flying Circus, though I admit Monty Python had more than a little influence. It's just Drama Week at Ye Olde Academy^TM.

For the past five years, instead of having my 9th grade students take a midterm exam for my English Oral Communication class I've had them give English speeches instead. However, my working partner this year, Ms. Y, suggested we try having them perform skits instead. I thought it sounded like an intriguing idea, so we went for it.

As it turned out, my idea was quite different from what Ms. Y had imagined. She wanted to have the kids learn three skits, and then we would choose one of them at random for them to perform on presentation day. My thought was to divide the students into groups, have each choose one skit from a list, and then let them throw everything into preparing their performance. In the end, we wound up going with my plan.

First we had to come up with the skits themselves. We had a whole supply of English conversation books that had all sorts of dialogues, but these suffered in that they:

tended to have only two characters instead of three or four, and

were generally dull as a wooden sword.

Boredom is something I tend not to deal with very well, so I decided to put my muse to work and make the dramas myself. I used the topics in the textbook dialogues as a guide, but I also drew a lot from Monty Python, Benny Hill, and other famously silly (but not too obscene) comedians for inspiration. I came up with twelve skits in all, and I had a ball doing it. Then, during the next week of classes, we had the students divide into groups (and give their groups names, of course!). Next we had them choose the skit they wanted perform from the title only (i.e. no reading it beforehand). Finally they were told that they had one week to get their skits ready for performance, with points awarded for such things as preparation, memorization, interaction, and body language as well as their English delivery.

The kids generally looked like they were ready to panic, as they had never done anything like it before. Indeed, there was some worry between Ms. Y and I (and other members of the faculty) that we were heading for disaster.

Our worries were strangely reinforced as we rearranged the English classroom into a makeshift theater, setting up a makeshift stage and moving the desks and chairs to allow both a good view and an optimum camera angle. It was a lot of work, and it would have been a shame for all of it to be for nothing!

Actually, we were pleasantly surprised. One of the two advanced classes was a terrible disappointment, as nearly all the groups just stood like statues on the stage and read their scripts in a dull monotone (and got deathly low scores as a result). However, the other advanced class and the three regular classes were a lot of fun. Some of the groups clearly put a lot of effort into preparing and rehearsing. Most of them at least made an effort to do it all from memory. There were props, there was artistic license, there were improvs, there was some really funny dramatic characterization, and there were a few colossal blunders...which often led to more improvs! All in all, the kids in all but that one class had a tremendous blast with it! I have to say it was a lot of fun watching (and scoring) all those performances, and I can't wait to sit back and watch the video!

Hmm...maybe I should try to figure out a way to post a couple of the more memorable performances...

"Today's specials are hamburg steak with natto, pork fillet with natto, natto pizza, natto salad with natto dressing, natto sandwich with extra natto, natto, and French-fried natto, and natto-covered natto with natto on natto, tomatoes with natto, natto, and natto."

"Do you have anything without natto?"

"Well, the natto salad with natto dressing hasn't got much natto in it."

"I don't want any natto!"

(At this point I had to restrain myself to keep from holding my fingers to my head like Viking horns and singing, "Natto, natto, natto, natto...nattoey natto...wonderful natto!" With many apologies to the Pythons...)